


Flowers for Julian

by AndYetNotBeingDisenchanted



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Dominion War, Dominion internment camp, Episode Related, First Time, Love Confessions, M/M, Mild Angst, Mpreg, Mutual Pining, Paternal Sisko, Pregnancy, Pregnant Julian Bashir, Unplanned Pregnancy, fist kiss, not explicit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-15
Updated: 2017-08-15
Packaged: 2018-12-15 15:30:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,984
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11808870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AndYetNotBeingDisenchanted/pseuds/AndYetNotBeingDisenchanted
Summary: After having sex under the hands of the Dominion Julian is pregnant- and he plans to go it alone.For Odo/Quark fans, there is a first kiss in here amongst the Garashir!





	Flowers for Julian

Garak couldn't breathe, his hands shook and he pushed out of the wall, ignoring the wires hanging behind him. He grasped Julian’s hand, his grey against the doctor's golden tan. Julian pulled him out and onto the makeshift bed, his brow furrowed, a line appearing between his heavy black brows, his hand resting on the Cardassian's chest as it slowed. “Doctor!” Garak rasped. Julian looked towards him, his eyes widening before sliding back into impassive. “My dear Doctor, I am alright, perfectly fine at this point.” he smiled, the ridges around his eyes crinkling.

“Garak- were you- having a panic attack?”

“Of course not my dear!” Garak sat up so their faces were mere inches apart, “I was simply-” he trailed off, the smile falling from his face, before quickly returning, “Doctor I-” he leaned into Julian's chest and a tan hand came up to stroke his back.

“What's going on, Garak? You can tell me, you can tell me anything.” Garak looked up at the doctor his neck craning, he pushed up so their lips touched, Julian grunted in surprise before melting into the kiss he had craved for so long. His hands rested on the other's shoulders and Garak's crept down his back clutching his narrow waist.  

Their lips moved against one another, becoming more frantic as hands pushed under tunics and trousers. They gasped as Julian pulled away, “We shouldn't, Garak” Julian pulled his hands out from under Garak's shirt.

“My dear doctor-” Garak gasped, “It seemed like you wanted to- I thought-”

“No- I do want to- you have to understand, Garak; I've wanted to for so long- but not in a Dominion prison, not when General Martok of Kronos could walk in at any moment.” he shook his head.

“Please Doctor- if not now, then when?"

They pulled into the shuttle bay and Worf was transported directly to sickbay. Garak and Julian checked into sickbay, and they debriefed. When Julian sat down to lunch with Garak and Ziyal  his breath caught at the sight of their hands joined and sitting on the table. Julian turned away with his eyes closed before smiling and turning back.

He decided he was foolish to think that anything would have changed. In the weeks that followed he began to ignore Garak, unable to bear seeing him and Ziyal this joined hands and sometimes lips.

When Dr. Lewis Zimmerman arrived in the station, Julian wasn't worried, he wasn't worried at all- as he saw it, it wasn't worth worrying about every little thing that came up, that was no way to live. When his parent arrived he was furious, they were self righteous- of course they were, they didn't give a damn what he thought- not that it would matter- time travel was as illegal as augmentation.

When Julian heard his genetic engineering had come out he nearly fainted, but then he had walked to Captain Sisko's office to resign. He had nothing left on the station. Garak was with Ziyal, Dax was increasingly interested in Worf by the day, Leeta seemed intent on Rom- for whatever reason, Miles was great, of course, but he wasn't going to take the engineering well, that was for sure.

Everyone cared about him, he hadn't brought it up to Garak- it was simply to difficult, but his father had given up his freedom so Julian could keep his position, none of his friends seemed to mind the fact that he was an augment. Julian even felt relief that he had such a tremendous weight off of his chest.

 

Julian sat on the floor of the sickbay bathroom, sweat pooling on his brow. He wiped his forehead with his sleeve and struggled for air, his back pressed against the cool tile. He sat up and vomited into the replicator again, he moaned and stood up, leaving the bathroom and tapping Nurse Jarbara on the shoulder, “Nurse, I am not fit for duty.” he said, running a hand through his sweaty hair, “Can you watch sickbay today? Hail me if anything happens?”

“Of course, Doctor.” she looked him up and down, “Would you like me to scan you- to try and find the source of your- illness?”

“Ah- sure, Nurse; thank you very much.” Jarbara ran the tricorder up and down the doctor's form.

“Are you a carrier, Doctor? Nevermind, don't answer that. I don't really know what to say, Doctor, except- congratulations.” Julian stumbled back onto the biobed.

“I'm sorry, what?” he squeezed his eyes closed, remembering the confirmation that he was a carrier at age 16,  _ Garak! _ he thought, he had never thought to get a BC shot that worked the other way- he had never been with another man. “Shit.” he whispered, dragging a hand through his hair again, “Thank you nurse, excuse me.”  he left sickbay and collapsed onto the floor of his quarters, tears falling down his cheeks uninhibited. He wiped at them but couldn't slow the flow.

A hand settled on his lower belly, and he stood up, leaning on the doorframe as he waited for the dizziness to pass. He made his way to ops, Chief smiled at him and Worf nodded. Jadzia raised a hand in greeting. Kira looked up from her station, “Julian,” she said, “Aren't you on duty?”

“Ah- yes, I should be.” he tried to smile but knew he probably wasn't pulling it off. Jadzia stood up and walked around her station to lay a hand on his shoulder.

“Julian, are you alright?” her spots reflected the lights of ops.

“Yes, of course!” he tried again to smile, “I just need to speak with the Captain.” he walked past Jadzia and into Captain Sisko’s office. The older man sat behind his desk,

“Ah, Doctor Bashir!” he smiled and motioned towards the chair, “What can I do for you?” Julian sat down great fully, trying to constrain the tears threatening to fall.  His attempts quickly proved failures as he began to cry, tears falling from his already swollen eyes. Benjamin stood up and walked around his desk to sit beside Julian, “Hey, what's wrong?” they were both aware of the parallels between how Benjamin was treating Julian and how he usually treated Jake.

“I'm pregnant.” Julian whispered, “I thought it right to let you know and to perhaps lessen my involvement on away team missions, sir.” Benjamin's hand sat on the younger man's back.

“Who's the father, Julian- not that you have to tell me, I just didn't think you were involved with anyone.”

“Garak.” Julian said, “Can I trust you to keep this- between us?”

“Of course.”

 

Julian pulled the zipper on the blue part of his uniform all of the way to his neck, ignoring the uncomfortable squeeze on his belly. He put the black outer jumpsuit on and dragged a comb through his hair. He leaned into the counter, his right hand holding him up and his left on the swell of his belly, barely noticeable through his uniform. He left his quarters and greeted his mother in the shuttle bay. “Jules!” Amsha smiled and wrapped her arms around her son, ravishing the feel of the firm swell of her grandchild, “I am so happy to see you.” she kissed his chin and he kissed the top of her head.

“Come on, let's go to my quarters, Mother- or we could stop at the replimat if you’re hungry.”

“You quarters would be lovely, dear.” she said, following him to the habitat ring. They sat on opposite sides of the couch, Julian balanced a Tarkalean tea on his knee and Amsha held a glass of white wine. “Forgive me for asking, Jules- I know you told me not to- but who is the father.”

Julian sighed and looked away, “His name is Garak. He's a um, he has the tailing shop on this station, a Cardassian.” he placed a hand on his belly and smiled at his mother.

“And he doesn't want to be involved?”

“It's not that exactly, Mom, it's more that- he's involved with someone else, and it was clear when we- um, conceived our baby, that it was a one time thing, I just don't think that it would be worth it, telling him; you know- dragging him into an engagement he clearly doesn't want to be a part of.”

“Jules, he has every right to know- you’re deceiving him by not telling him.”

“He isn't exactly a paladin for the truth.” Julian sighed, “I don't want to talk about it, Mother.”

“I understand.” Amsha scooted closer to her son, resting a hand on his belly, “I remember when I found out I was pregnant with you- I was so excited, so was your father.”

“And I disappointed you.”

“No- no, Jules; never. We were worried about you, we were worried about you succeeding with such a- disadvantage.”

“So you turned me into Charlie Gordon.” Julian scoffed.

“Jules, I know you don't agree with our choices- but would you be having this baby if we hadn't done it. We didn't do it for our pride Jules, we did it because we wanted you to have the life that you deserved.”

Julian cried and leaned into Amsha, “I know, I'm glad it's out now- I was so afraid for so long- and now it's all okay, and I'm having a baby, but I still have all of this anger worked up. I'm sorry Mama.”

“I know,” she placed a hand in his hair and held him to her bosom as she hadn't in what was approaching thirty years, “And I am sorry, I know it was hard for you- all of it. I know that you probably wouldn't make the same choices we did, but I hope you will forgive us.”

Julian nodded, “Will you tell Dad that I'm having a baby, his grandbaby?”

“Of course, Julian.”

They stood after a period of resting in each other's arms and made their way towards the replimat. Jadzia came over halfway through dinner and sat in the extra chair, “Julian, who is this?” she smiled at the doctor and then at Amsha.

“Ah- this is my Mother, Amsha Bashir.” he smiled as his mother and Jadzia shook hands.

“I am Jadzia Dax, it is a pleasure to meet you.” she smiled, “I'm the chief science officer aboard Deep Space Nine. How long are you on the Station?”

Amsha smiled, “As long as Jules will have me- though I would like to stay at least until he has the baby.” Julian paled and Jadzia’s brows shot up.

“Baby- Julian?” she looked to Julian, who brought a hand to protect his baby from the rush of anxiety.

“Ah yes, um, Garak's. Yes.” his mother was sending him a sickening apologetic look while Jadzia broke into a smile.

“Well that's great, Julian! Congratulations! But Garak is still with Ms. Tora, with Ziyal- isn't he.” Julian began mussitations before Jadzia corrected herself, “But that's fine, you'll be great, Julian- I'm counting on Godmother.” she smiled, “How far along are you?”

“Sixteen weeks.”

“But that means you conceived when you were in the- Julian- he didn’t- he didn't take advantage of you did he?” her brow furrowed, “I swear, I will beat that bastard with a bat’leth if he did.”

“No, Jadzia- you knew I was pretty- infatuated with him.”

Jadzia smiled and looked to Amsha, “Well it was a pleasure to meet you. I'll leave you guys to it.” she pushed herself up with a hand on Julian's shoulder, “Congratulations again, Julian.” she walked towards Worf, who was standing in the corridor, apparently looking for her as well.

 

By the time Julian was in his Seventeenth week, he knew it was time to tell the senior staff. He stood at the front of Ops- which was devoid of everyone except for Kira, O’Brien, Jadzia, Worf and Sisko; Odo sat on Kira's station, “I'm pregnant. Seventeen weeks. The father is out of the picture.” that was all he said before making his way to the turbolift. He was cut off by a hand on his shoulder.

“Congratulations, Julian.” Miles smiled, the lights casting the shadow of curly hair on his forehead, “I didn't take you for the family type, but you'll be great; kids are wonderful, Julian.”

“This is wonderful, Julian!” Nerys stood up and hugged him, “I hope I have one of my own one day-” she smiled, “I suppose I'll have to fight Jadzia for godmother.”

“Congratulations, Doctor.” Odo smiled, “I know what it feels like- the excitement that comes along with having a baby.” Julian patted Odo on the shoulder, knowing that not long prior he had thought he was going to act as a father to a baby changeling.

“Congratulations Doctor. Despite the lack of a father your child will have great honor.” Worf smiled slightly, but a fierce look of determination remained, “Fatherhood is difficult, but you, no doubt, will excell.”

Sisko patted him on the shoulder and Jadzia hugged him, both offering their respective congratulations.

 

Garak sat at a table with Ziyal, they looked out over Quarks, Garak hadn't seen Julian in weeks- he never seemed to be at Quark’s- and his hours in the infirmary seemed fewer, so that whenever Garak would try to contact him he would be in his quarters- or O'Brien's quarters, or even Dax’s quarters. “Doctor Bashir is pregnant.” Ziyal said, breaking the silence, “Nerys is very excited for him. I suppose that's why he hasn't been joining us for lunch lately.”

“Doctor Bashir?” Garak’s eye ridges shot up, his breath felt constricted, “Who- who is the other father?”

Ziyal shrugged and then smiled, “Out of the picture I guess- you know how he is.”

“Ziyal- I'm afraid we must end our romantic involvement.”

Ziyal’s head jerked towards him, “What? Why? Because of Julian?”

“I am simply no longer comfortable with it- my feelings for you- while genuine are- superficial.” he stood up.

“I always knew you were in love with him.” she sighed and stood up as well, kissing him on the cheek, “I understand, are we still on for lunch next week?”

“Yes, of course. I am very sorry to do this to you, my dear.”

The Cardassian ran from Quarks all of the way to sickbay. Julian looked up when he came in but quickly looked back at his computer. Garak walked around the station to see the noticeable  bulge of his belly in his uniform, “Doctor.” he gasped, stepping back, “Who fathered your- your baby, Julian.”

Julian's eyes were wide, “Garak don't.”

“Don't what? Doctor. It's just a question that I think that I'm entitled to the answer to.”

“Why, Garak, would you be entitled to any knowledge pertaining my personal life? And anyway, how would you know if I was telling the truth anyway, it is, as you say, in the eye of the beholder.”

“Please Julian.” Garak let the anger drain at the obvious state of distress Julian was in, the tears threatening to fall from those- beautiful brown eyes, “Just tell me if it's mine.”

“It is.” Julian whispered, his hands shaking as he takes them away from the microscope. “I'm sorry, I should have been more careful.”

“Why didn't you tell me?”

Julian glanced at his eyes, Garak's voice betrayed more emotion than he had ever heard in the Cardassian’s voice, “I didn't want to destroy your relationship with Ziyal- I didn't want you to resent me and- the baby for something you didn't have to.”

“My relationship with Ziyal was a farce, I love you, Julian, my dear Doctor, I adore you! I thought when we came back from the camp and you stopped having lunch, that you- that you regretted it.”

Tears streamed out of Julian's eyes, “I could never, Garak- seeing you with Ziyal- I thought that things were going to change, but you were holding her hand and- Garak. I love you; I've always loved you.” he stood up and embraced him. Letting his full belly press against Garak.

Garak took his chin in his hand, and brought their lips together, “Will you marry me- Julian?” he asked, his lips moving against Julian's. Tain’s voice.mocked him for going soft but Garak couldn't care less as he held the man carrying his child in his arms. When Julian didn't respond Garak continued, “We've known each other for five years, and if you're feelings for me are as you have proclaimed them, my dear Doctor; if your feelings are even a fraction of mine- then I think that-”

“Okay.” Julian said, interrupting what was clearly going to be embarrassing for his - fiance- would it be?

“Just 'okay’? Why, my dear doctor- I hoped you would be a bit more enthusiastic than that!”

“I've wanted this for so long- I'd rather not soil it with dramatics.” he smiled and kissed Garak slowly, tenderly. Garak smiled and placed a hand on the rounded bump of his child, safe inside of Julian, whom he had loved since he first had lunch with him- too long ago.

 

Amsha wrapped her arms around Garak, they were close to the same height. Amsha smiled and pushed him back to look at him, “A Cardassian! It's so exciting to have a non-Terran in the family.” Julian blushed and ran a hand through his hair again, Garak shot him a look and smiled at the Terran wedding band on his lover's finger. He wore blue make up on the 'spoon’ on his forehead to represent his engagement, “I knew you would want to be involved- I told Julian as much- and do you know what he said? He said, 'Garak is no advocate for the truth.’”

“Well I can't argue with that, Mrs. Bashir.” Garak said, his eye twinkling.

“Oh, call me Amsha at the very least!” Garak took a step towards Julian and wrapped an arm around his waist. “Oh! I’ll finish dinner, you two must be starving! Especially you, Jules!” Julian rolled his eyes but kissed Garak on the brow.  They sat down at the table.

 

Julian held Garak's hand as they strolled through the silent promenade, the station hummed and creaked in a way you couldn't hear with the hustle and bustle of the Bajoran day. A few people sat around but compared to the usual amount it was empty. Julian rustled the chain on Quarks door, it gave and he walked in, Garak just behind him. They stopped dead when they saw Odo and Quark sitting at a Dabo table. Julian's augmented hearing let him pick up on their conversation.

“You can't honestly call me down here- in the middle of the night to accuse me of stealing- it's just not right, Odo.” Quark said, his ears twitching slightly.

“That's not why I'm here, Quark.” Odo said, leaning in so he could feel Quarks breath quicken in the proximity, “I'm here because I'm just close enough to reverting to a liquid to confess.”

“Confess what, Odo?” Quark asked, his interest piqued. Odo said nothing but leaned in the rest of the way, kissing Quark with his makeshift lips, his hands cupping the Ferengi’s ears.

Julian and Garak stepped out of Quarks, “Jesus.” Julian whispered, “I just wanted to go to Vic’s.” he smiled, a hand resting in his sizeable bump, the one that housed the baby whose kicking kept him from sleeping. Garak lead him back to their shared quarters.

“You know, my dear Doctor; you say it's the baby- but I say you're nervous about the wedding in the morning.” Garak smiled and rubbed the small of Julian's back.

“What's to worry about? You've taken out my dress uniform so it fits, I'm not worried about you running out or anything like that. I'm excited, if anything, we’ll be married this time tomorrow.” Julian beamed, “But now that you mention it- I am rather tired.”

When they rose Julian was beaming with excitement and Garak with pride. They stood in Quark's, Benjamin officiating and Quark catering (of course). There were cheers and chardonnay- for everyone but Julian. Quark and Odo stood together in a far corner until Julian shouted, “We're your friends Dammit! Hold hands, be happy, show us how much you love each other!” Odo mumbled an excuse before Quark grasped his hand, smiling as the changing stepped back.

Jadzia sat in Worf’s lap, a glass of Chardonnay in her hand. She leaned in and kissed Word on the cheek before walking up to Julian, “Congratulations, Julian! Despite what all the pessimists say- marriage is great, And this is coming from someone who's been married four times!” she turned to Garak, “Congratulations to you as well, Mister Garak!”

When she left Julian snorted, “She's drunk” he said with a smile on his face.

 

Julian woke up in a cold sweat to the unmistakable feeling of blood trickling down his legs, he jumped to his feet, hands shaking as he commed sickbay, panic rising in his throat. He didn't bother dressing himself before he was transported to sickbay. Doctor Reid prepped him for surgery, her fingers sure and her jaw tight, she brought the baby out with almost no difficulty, resting it in the arms of a nurse before healing the incision.

Captain Sisko's was at his side when he was wheeled out of surgery. Amsha had left when Julian and Garak were married and Garak was on a mission in Dominion space. Julian cried when he saw the captain and embraced him, burrowing his head in the man who had become a father figure in the 5 years he had known him, “The baby?” the captain asked once Julian had calmed down.

“I don't know.” he said, “I shouldn't have given birth for another three months, Captain. He was so small- he was blue.” Julian seemed calm, too calm. Benjamin didn't question it, better that than panic.

When the nurse brought the baby out Julian perked up, he sat up straight and took the baby dutifully in his arms, he was tiny, covered in ridges and scales and a light tan color, his eyes.were shut. Julian cried as a tiny hand wrapped around his finger. Benjamin smiled and left.

In the morning sickbay was full, Jadzia and Worf were away on the mission with Garak but Kira and Miles stood at the bedside, Kira cooing at the baby and Miles grinning. At some point Odo and Quark squeezed in to see the baby, Odo hanging back while Quark came in, jokingly offering to sell Julian ridiculously priced baby clothes.

 

The Defiant touched down in the shuttle bay, Jadzia and Worf watched Garak as he waited for the airlock to open, his hands itching at his sides while he inched towards the door, once it opened he ran through the station to sickbay, Julian was asleep on a biobed and in a bassinet beside him was a baby with obvious Cardassian features. Garak choked at the sight, his face was a mask of calm while he scooped the baby up, while he held him- warm, like Julian- he began to cry in a most embarrassing fashion.

Julian eased awake and gazed at his husband and son sitting beside him, Garak startled when he saw him awake but soon smiled, their son was asleep in his arms, “What will we call him?” he asked.

Julian shrugged, “I thought we'd have a bit longer to figure it out.” he said. Garak was silent so Julian continued, “The baby went into distress- if your physiology hadn't sparked a premature birth he wouldn't be here right now.”

“I'm sorry it happened when I wasn't here, my dear Doctor.”

“Don't be, it wasn't your fault.”

“Well, I promise to be here for the rest of it, Julian.” Garak smiled and kissed his husband before laying the baby in the bassinet, “I've never been quite so happy, Julian.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so very much for reading, I hope you enjoyed. Please point out errors (I'm sure there will be some). The name comes from 'Flowers for Algernon' by Daniel Keyes- just to reference Julian's augmentation- he references it here while talking to Amsha. 
> 
> Thanks again for reading!


End file.
